If you haven’t seen an old friend for years, and only in the
past six years or so of being a member on Facebook was able to be “reunited”,
are they still a friend? Personally I feel that depends on how close the two of
you were in face-to-face dealings originally. I don’t have Facebook friends
that I never had a real relationship with at some point in my life and usually
it has to be more than, “oh yeah, I kind of remember him/her”. My Facebook “friends”
number around 80, most of whom are relatives or I went to high school with.
Eighty friends is a low number on Facebook.
Today on Facebook there was a shocking message, a friend of
mine died 5 days ago. Without Facebook I may not have heard about his death for
a long time. Scott was a good friend in high school. He went out of state for
college so our contact lessened to when Scott came home on school breaks. His
death was totally unexpected to me. If he had been sick recently I didn’t know
about it. The memories that flood my brain when something like this happens are
incredible.
Scott and I played high school football together. Neither of
us was particularly big, definitely not by today’s standards. By our senior
year we were each around 6’ and weighed maybe 160 (if I was in my shoulder pads
and helmet). We usually played offensive guard and/or linebacker. We were not
stars, and if I look back realistically he was a bit better player than me. In
high school football if you don’t mind getting hit and giving the same, you can
generally find a spot to play. That was basically us I think.
He was a good guy, fun to be around. One time, I can’t
remember how, we ended up together at Hamlin Beach State park. I had biked
there and I have no idea how Scott got there. We were probably in 9th
or 10th grade. We ended up needing to get back to Brockport, maybe
twenty miles away. So we took turns pedaling my old 10 speed bike with the
other person on the handlebars or crossbar. It was hard going, but fun.
When we were of legal driving age he took me to his family’s
cottage on Silver Lake in NY. I went water skiing for the first time in my life
and had a blast. His Mom made us hamburgers and I ate three. I remember Scott
being surprised I ate that much and saying, “I can’t believe it, the only
person I know who can eat three of those is my Dad and look at him, he’s huge!”
(his Dad was a big man). We woke up in the morning and the boat had sunk. I
felt guilty, like either my water skiing or hamburger eating had caused it.
And now he’s dead, at 58, which doesn’t seem particularly
old anymore. He leaves behind a wife and two daughters, friends, a business, many
other loved ones. I’m glad we reconnected on Facebook. It feels like there
should have been more, at least with the memories I have, but I guess I have to
take what I can.
